EXPECTATIONS… <3
This week after speaking to my partner it was brought to my attention, that I will need Spencer to be cared for overnight, 2 nights to be exact. My eldest has a basketball rep game in MacKay. The trip will be long and tiering for little Spencer, and it will be hard to be present for my older sons game when I have so much to focus on with Spencer. If so, this will be the first time ever Spencer will be looked after overnight. Unfortunately, being the overprotective mum I am, my first thoughts are how will he ever survive without his mummy and bedtime cuddles!!!
The carers I currently have, have been in Spencer’s life since he was 1 years old, and so it only makes sense to have them do the overnight stays. Spencer’s carers have been specifically trained to know the ins and outs of his needs, as well as his cheeky personality.
I think when it comes to being a parent you can never be too cautious with who you trust, and I absolutely believe that carers should meet your expectations when it comes to the care of your little one, especially one that cannot advocate for themselves. I have parts of me, of course that feel immediate guilt when it comes to leaving Spencer alone for a night, even more so than leaving my older two children. Unlike the older two who can voice how they feel, Spencer cannot, and so for me it is crucial that the person who cares for him understands his cues when it comes to communicating his needs.
Whilst this mentality may seem over the top, it is a mentality I also take into my business. My carers are also expected to be highly trained with knowledge and understanding on their clients. I feel there is absolutely nothing wrong with being fussy with who you trust, and most definitely, you should be picky!
Now onto tackling the mum guilt involved with all of this…. I figure its better to rip the Band-Aid off now than avoid it and leave it to fester as a bigger problem later in life. As with any fear, the more exposed you are to it, the less it becomes a fear and more a normal practise of life. Spencer requires 24/7 care, he cannot walk, he cannot talk, and he cannot feed himself. The reality is that this will only get harder the older and heavier he gets. I will need help to juggle all of this. Eventually there will be times where Spencer will not be able to travel where I go, whether that be plane trips, or overseas adventures with the older two children. :D
Spencer will be okay. He will be safe and surrounded by those who love and cherish him. He will not know any different, only that those he loves are back to greet him with smiles and showers of love. I remember I mentioned this in my previous blogs, “Ignorance is Bliss” and Ignorance truly is blissful, something Spencer will encounter daily. If anything, It would be selfish of me to keep him all to myself due to my own mum guilt, I do know for a fact that Spencer absolutely loves attention, he loves crowds and being surrounded by people, so why not let others in on the joy he brings to many. <3