“THE GOOD PARENT”

By author- Alisha Prien

It’s hard being a “Good” parent…

This week has been a challenging one, being a parent is hard, or at least the parent guilt that comes with being a parent makes it hard.  You never know if what you are doing is right or not. Its like a constant radio that never turns off. A radio full of voices in the form of parental anxiety. An anxious voice constantly screaming things at you… “You are too mean to harsh, to soft, not cuddling them enough, give them more love, do more, be more, Be Better” …

 I’ve come to the conclusion that there is no such thing as “being a good parent”. There is such thing as doing what’s right by your children and “what’s best for them and their interests. If I’m being honest, I’ve often fallen more on the softer side of parenting which really hasn’t served me in the past, partly due to having an overly confident and outspoken daughter.  I don’t think any of us ever gets it 100 percent right…

What I do know is that if our hearts are always in it for the kids, then I think we are doing okay. In fact, I think more of us need to tell each other how great we are doing as parents. I don’t think we say that enough.  Sometimes all it takes is a few kind words from one mother or father to another to make a difference. We’ve all been that mum or dad at one point in our life with screaming kids in the backseat, (us) on the verge of a meltdown or considering putting our head through a brick wall (at least I know I have thought of this once or twice).  Imagine during that moment you have someone come up and say, “you know what mama/ Dadio, I feel ya, its shit, but just so you know, you’re doing great, you got this”. I feel like those few words of support could shut down that radio of doubt in an instant.

WORDS. ARE. POWERFUL.

#NOTE-

Parenting method (Suggestion):

For those that have some ratbags who may be outspoken and confident, a parenting strategy that I’ve found works best for these guys; is” Assertive “parenting. Again, this is just what works for my family and our kids, and it may not suit all 😊

One thing I do know is, Kids thrive off boundaries and consistency. If anything, they crave to be shown a way to independence, creativity and problem solving. I have found, at least for me that assertive parenting creates these qualities in kids… It’s not about being their friends, but it’s also not about being controlling and dominating either. It’s about asserting yourself as a parent, instilling your boundaries, and giving kids guidelines to continue with as they grow and mature.
Summary:

Basically, there is no right way to parent, and we don’t always get it right all the time. I think if we are doing what’s best for our kids and our intentions are pure, then that’s all they can ask for. Also, next time you see a mum or dad in the midst of a mental breakdown… take a minute to pass on those few kind words, you never know whose day you might impact in a positive way. <3